crawling

i still get choked up thinking about chester bennington and his death. "crawling" is a song that just, man, it just hits me. i guess i'm thinking about it this morning because I've been really struggling with anxiety of late, especially at night. i dont know why it has begun to really rear its ugly head in the past two months. i find myself at so much peace, so much zen in the morning. coffee, laptop, music, good vibes, good headspace. nighttime, well, it couldn't be worse. theories are a plenty, some of which i like, others not so much. one that does hold a little water, in my head at least, is that after substance abuse for 15+ years - almost always at night - its not surprising that withdrawal symptoms can still occur. I'm going to chalk it up to that for the immediate, and I just hope it begins to get better. the expression "crawling in my skin" just couldn't be more accurate.....i would assume that anyone else out there who has struggled with capital A anxiety knows what he meant when he wrote it. RIP Chester Bennington, and sending as many good vibes as I can to everyone out there. Have a great day. Lots of love, stay in the EMO, its OK to feel it and breathe it and live it, its all good. JL